Parenting Strong Willed Children
I have taught many of children in my career and have met so many different personalities. Every child really is unique. I have always been extremely fascinated with strong willed children. Their confidence, their decisiveness, their sense of justice and their ability to stand alone! I know that parenting strong willed children can be exhausting, but I also know that strong willed children also grow up to not only do great things, but to make incredible contributions to our society.
Compliance is something that we like to see as adults. Some children are naturally more compliant than others, and although we can shape compliance in many ways, we do need to take the personalities of our children into consideration.
Strong willed children are generally spirited and courageous. The don’t fit well into the ‘seen’ but not ‘heard’ box. They thrive on independence. They are experiential learners that excel when they feel as though they are in charge of themselves. This sometimes creates power struggles in the household. Especially if your child has their heart set on something and needs to switch gears. Power struggles, as simple as which pajamas need to be worn, can create frustration for parents, and therefore it’s important to take your child’s personality into account when parenting.
Before I give you some strategies for strong willed children, I want to remind you parents, that there are some amazing long-term benefits for our strong-willed children. As they mature, they are often driven and extremely self-motivated. They are less likely to give into peer pressure and they are not afraid to stand up for their rights or the rights of others. In my books, these are important reasons to be intentional about the way you parent your strong-willed children, and to be mindful of the impulse to 'put them in their place' or show them who is the boss.
Here are some tips when parenting strong-willed children:
Today we had the pleasure of working with some of the K1-Grade 2 teachers from around the country. We had such a great time sharing and learning together!
We explored âThe Importance of Early Mathematics.â Often in the early years, because literacy is so important, math takes the back burner. The thing is, math is just as important, and in many ways lays an essential foundation for literacy development.
The topics covered in todayâs workshop were:
Earlier this week we had the pleasure of hosting a few employees from the Turks and Caicos Islands Sports Commission. In addition to offering ESL services, we are also available to provide support with teaching. Sometimes there are new protocols or systems that you may need your employees to learn, and you may need some guidance on how to best introduce and practice the materials. In this case, Ms. Guilmise, who also speaks Creole, was able to bridge the language gap to increase understanding.
I often get questions about ADHD. These questions come from two directions. Parents who are concerned that their children are exhibiting signs of ADHD, and adults who are concerned that they may be.
ADHD is not something that is cured or outgrown, but it is something that can be successfully managed. Like in children, Adult ADHD stands for attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder, a syndrome characterized by an impaired ability to regulate activity level (hyperactivity), attend to tasks (inattention), and inhibit behavior (impulsivity). ADHD is thought to be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain that affects the parts controlling attention, concentration and impulsivity. (Adultadhd.com)
ADHD may affect how one learns but does not actually affect intelligence. Individuals with ADHD are often very quick minded and intelligent. The key to being successful for individuals with ADHD often lies in the individual’s ability to assess their strengths and use them to their advantage, and to assess their areas of struggle and tap into strategies to support these struggles.
So, what does ADHD look like in adults?
Predominantly Inattentive: The predominantly inattentive type is an adult that is often seen as very dreamy and often not paying attention but just in their own world. Overall, they have difficulty keeping their mind focused which affects their concentration in conversation and when executing tasks. These individuals often are easily bored. Which sometimes has them constantly looking for attention.
Predominantly Hyperactive: The predominantly hyperactive type is the adult that just always seems on the go. They never seem to stop. Individuals in this category are often restless and have trouble sitting still. On the upside, they are often capable to fit more into a day than the average person because of their need to be constantly doing something.
Predominantly Impulsive: Individuals that are predominantly impulsive often have a hard time controlling their immediate reactions. This can lead to difficulties controlling verbal outbursts and problems with addictions to gambling, shopping, substance abuse etc.
Individuals that have ADHD can have difficulty filtering information. This makes it very easy to get distracted, to be impulsive and act before they consider situations properly and often not knowing when to stop. As you can imagine, these symptoms can have an effect on an individual starting a new job or continuing their studies or even raising a family.
So how can one successfully deal with ADHD as an adult? Firstly, ADHD is a medically diagnosed disorder and it’s a good idea to consult your physician. Share your suspicions and get some feedback on whether medical intervention would be beneficial. Next, reflect on your recognizing areas of strength and areas of concern. Start by writing a list. Having this list will give guidance on areas that need to be tackled.
Here are my top 6 helpful tips for Adults with ADHD.
Yesterday we made a quick trip over to Grand Turk to speak on the theme âStepping into 2023- Balance and Prioritiesâ with the administrative staff from the Ministry of Health. Although productivity was the main focus for this presentation, participants were reminded of the role personal development plays in oneâs professional growth.
Itâs always important to have clarity on your intentions. Once you have clarity, you can align your mindset and your actions to lay the foundation for achieving your personal and professional goals.
Today we had an awesome morning working with the @departmentofyouthtci facilitating a Youth Skills Workshop on their behalf in North Caicos. The Raymond Gardiner High School students spent to morning exploring âCelebrating Diversity and Building Resilience Through Human Capitalâ.
Topics covered at the workshop included:
Jumpstart 2023 - Parent Workshop
Yesterday evening Learn and Lead hosted its first parent workshop since 2019! It was such a pleasure!
Jumpstart 2023 is a positive parenting workshop that focuses on:
We look forward to more parent workshops in the future!
Each year I create a signature personal coaching program that is designed to help my clients dive deep into their personal growth. The aim of this is to guide them in reflecting on their current season and their vision for the future. Self- awareness is key to one's alignment.
Some of you may remember our past programs:
Authentic Power 2020
Activation 2021 - (still available)
Alignment 2022 - (still available)
This year, I am very excited to begin coaching with Elevate 2023. Elevate 2023 is a four-session experience which challenges you to gain clarity on your next level. We all have our own unique pathways to success and in order to honor these pathways and elevate to our next level, it's important that our intentions and mindsets are aligned with the vision we have for ourselves. This program provides the personal development needed to not only impact your personal life but to accelerate growth in your professional life. We will dive deep into your paradigms and your vision to make the alignments needed to Elevate to your next level. This program can be done one-on-one or in small intimate groups.
Happy New Year! Many of our children had a few weeks off school for their Christmas holidays. If your house is anything like mine, it may need a bit of a reset after the Christmas holidays!
Firstly, it’s important to always remember that as a parent, you are the first and only consistent teacher that your children will have. It is so important that we remember this and that we are intentional about the learning environments that we create in our homes. So even though our children have returned to school, and likely jumped back into their nightly homework and projects, remember the power of the learning that happens in their daily home environments, and that all learning is not necessarily driven by curriculum.
When our homes are environments that welcome learning as safe, fun, and exciting, there are increased opportunities for learning. Our children become questioners. They become critical thinkers. They become explorers. They become comfortable taking risks and pushing the limits. When parents are intentional about having an environment that promotes inquisitiveness, diversity of experiences, and they themselves understand that the work of childhood is to grow not only academically, but also emotionally, socially and physically… children thrive.
So, as you prepare where your children will sit to do their homework, put some thought into the home learning that you want them to do: the learning that goes beyond their homework and their projects, and the learning environment that you direct. A child’s learning environment is not about the stuff that mom and dad can buy, but it is about the energy in the home and the vision that parents have for the overall development of their children.
Here are my top 5 ways to set up a dynamic learning environment:
1. Have a vision. Ask yourself what is important to your child’s learning process. How do you want to see them develop emotionally, socially, academically, and physically? Keep this in mind as you are developing your current space.
2. Be intentional. When you are organizing the space for your children, be sure to know your ‘why?’ If you are buying any materials, make sure you answer the ‘why?’ What is the purpose? If you are changing around furniture…what is the purpose? When you have a clear vision for your learning space it is a lot easy to make intentional choice.
3. Understand the value of play. Play is often highlighted as the work of childhood. Play is essential for a child’s overall development; play is a strong root of learning, and it helps to develop a child’s creativity, problem solving skills and inquisitive nature.
4. Add to the positive environment with your joyful presence. Often as parents we can fall into the role of task master, especially with evening homework. Find times where you can play with your child in their environment and allow them to direct it. Be there to support their learning, whether it’s through dress up, a board game, or crafting.
5. Notice their curiosity. Whether your child has taken an interest in coding or crafting, notice their interests and build on them in positive ways. At school the learning path is usually dictated by curriculum objectives. At home, you have the power to encourage your children to follow and build on what excites them. The best learning occurs when your child is excited about what he or she is learning.
On Thursday evening we were happy to host a few members of staff from Grace Bay Pharmacy for our Customer Service Workshop.
Although it was an evening session, these staff members were full of energy and ready to learn. Way to go! @gracebaypharmacy
For small training groups, we are happy to host sessions at our facility. For more information about our soft skills training please visit www.learnandleadltd.com/training
Yolande Robinson, M.Ed.